I don’t always mean what I sing.
When I sing songs that demand full abandonment to the will and ways of a God that I cannot claim to completely trust yet, I don’t sing them from a place of unwavering faith. In fact, when I sing these lines, I am unsure, afraid and a little bit doubtful. I sing them fully aware of my incapacity to give God all of myself.
I choose to sing not because I’m there yet. I sing because I am confident that I am on a journey with Christ. I know that God is making me and moulding me. I sing these songs as a declaration. I cannot, but I am willing. If He is the author and perfecter of my faith, does it not make sense to sing of my faith (or lack thereof) to the very one who gives me faith?
“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders.”
I sing this line knowing that I don’t know how to fully let myself be submitted to and led by the tides, current, wind and weather of faith. No, when I sing this line, I really simply mean this:
“Help me take the next step.”
very very very few snaps from my first summer. majority from the first 5 days spent in phuket.
spent an entire afternoon reflecting on my first year at uni.
Listening to JT’s blue ocean floor at the beach during sunset was something i’ve been wanting to do for a while. The moment did not disappoint hehe.
filming a fire video for camp KAIO. it turned out to be one of the most fun days in summer!
some accidental snap sian but nvm it proves i’ve been to treetop walk haha.
Takeaways from summer 2015
- Lots of intentional meetups with sheeps: Before this, I never really did make it a point to get to know them at a personal level. But Jesus always made things personal. Gotta do the same. Still learning!
- Personal: Learnt again and again of how sinful and undeserving I am at Camp KAIO and Burning Hearts Conference. Got rekt.
- Working as a teacher Jul 2016: Fun (colleagues with joy and the other teachers) and fulfilling (being challenged and stretched in many ways)
- Breakthroughs in ministry: Kallos launched our new volume + our first book. I must not forget that this is not about us.
- Friends: Individual meetups with different people + Limtay Cell Retreat. I am so certain that we were not created to journey alone.
The thing that still remains as my favourite part of life in and out of season are conversations. Over summer, I’ve had so many intentional conversations with so many people that have challenged, rebuked, edified and encouraged me in many ways. Thank you friends, for walking life with me! (-:
The Faith > Fear rhetoric has never been more relevant in my life than now. I wish not to obey the painful nudging of my fears, but to follow faith’s little voice – even through silence.